Love is in the air and often at work. Forbes (2024) reports that half of us flirt at work, 19% have had a workplace romantic relationship, and 43% of us meet our spouse there. This is unsurprising as we spend half our waking hours at work five days a week, and the familiarity with our colleagues builds personal bonds and commonality.

The dark side of this is the insidious sexual harassment that is all too prevalent in workplaces. Although, at times, this can be attributed to colleagues “misreading the room” and thinking feelings are reciprocal, the workplace can also become a “hunting ground” for sexual relations, turning colleagues into predators and managers abusing their power to gain sexual favours. And then it is common that what was a workplace romance has festered into a sexual harassment claim.

Human Resources and managers face the challenges between these passions and problems.

Tokiso has investigated and presided over hundreds of sexual harassment allegations. Many cases are found to have a basis for the allegations; many do not. What we do know from our experience is that no case is the same, and each one requires sensitivity and specialist skills to ensure fairness prevails for both the complainant and the alleged perpetrator.

South Africa has had Codes of Good Practice concerning sexual harassment since 1998, with the most recent Code for the Prevention and Elimination of Harassment in the Workplace offering much-needed guidance for all forms of harassment, including sexual harassment. This, coupled with our tribunals and courts’ intolerance of sexual harassment, one would assume that employees would be mindful of their actions when engaging in sexual interludes. Yet, Tokiso’s experience shows that the prevalence persists.

The Code requires a company to adopt a harassment policy. Some international corporations have taken the extreme approach of banning any form of workplace romance. In our view, this is unrealistic as people will always seek love and romance, and we are not in a society where a person can up and readily find another job. What a company can, however, do is establish clear policies on what is expected when workplace romance flourishes and when an employee crosses the line to harassment.

Employees have a right to privacy. However, this is balanced against the organisation’s responsibility to maintain an equitable and professional workplace where conflict is managed. Below are some options to be considered for policies on relationships in the workplace.

Prohibition of Vertical Relationships

To avoid conflicts of interest and potential abuses of power, vertical romantic relationships – where one employee has a direct line of authority over another – should be discouraged, if not prohibited. Where such a relationship is fostered, it is incumbent on the senior person to report it to HR and find a solution to prevent an impact on the integrity of managerial decisions and perceptions of favouritism or bias.

Guidelines for Horizontal Relationships

Horizontal relationships may be permitted where there is no direct supervisory link. The senior or longest-serving individual in the relationship is more obligated to report the relationship to Human Resources (HR). The disclosure remains confidential unless a formal complaint arises. The responsibility to ensure that the organisation does not suffer detriment because of the relationship lies with the employees in the relationship.

HR’s role is to counsel the employees on the existing policy and provide guidance on mitigating potential risks that could affect the workplace environment. Consultation with their respective managers may also be necessary, depending on the situation.

Procedures Following the End of a Relationship

Should the relationship end, the employees must report this to HR immediately. This responsibility mainly lies with the more senior of the two employees. This is essential to pre-empt any potential conflicts or issues post-relationship.

Flings / Once-off Affairs

Like with horizontal relationships, it is the responsibility of the employees involved in once-off affairs to report this to HR to ensure that fling does not negatively impact the organisation. The disclosure remains confidential unless a formal complaint arises. And yes, this includes extra-marital affairs (which, according to Forbes, 85% of these start in the workplace)!

Responsibility of the Employees

It is the responsibility of the employees involved in the relationship to ensure that their involvement does not negatively impact the organisation. They must maintain professionalism and adhere to the company’s code of conduct.

Handling Complaints

Where there is a complaint of sexual harassment or harmful behaviour, the company must immediately inform the complainant that:

(a) they are protected from victimisation.

(b) the complaint is confidential initially unless it is taken further.

(c) they can get reasonable support from the company.

(d) they can consider an informal approach to resolve the complaint through engagement.  Alternatively, a formal approach of investigating the conduct, and discipline may follow should there be a basis for the complaint. These options, an innovation in South African law, allow the complainant and HR to align the response to the nature of the complaint.

If companies need assistance with this process, they may contact Tokiso.

Conclusion: Striking the Right Balance

Companies need to have clear policies on relationships and harassment in the workplace. This will facilitate fairness, clarity, and a healthier, more productive work culture.

In other words, ensure employees can distinguish between passion and problems!

How Tokiso can help

Contact Tokiso at info@tokiso.com for more information on how we can support your organisation with:

• Training on the prevention of harassment at work.
• Independent investigations by specialist Tokiso investigators to conduct a fair and objective harassment investigation.
• Chairpersons for hearings to preside over disciplinary action to grievance meetings.